Found Within
by DistrustfulLie
Summary: He had given away his life for those around him, until he finally realized that what he wanted, he could only have out of selfishness. So now, he decided to live for himself. . . and just go crazy.
1. Chapter 1

Found Within

Well, this is my first story I'm posting. The story will cement more later. Review if you want, flame if you want, I really don't care.

* * *

Looking back on it years later, Naruto guessed that one day he just got tired and he gave up. He gave up trying to be happy for the people who hated him. He naively had thought that by showing them a happy, kind side of him then they would learn to accept him. . .he was wrong. Everyday he put a fake smile on to make those around him, in the academy, and later in his Genin team, feel better about the chaos surrounding their lives as shinobi. He had practically sacrificed his own feeling and emotions for the good of others, yet they still treated him like shit. He still experienced the glares and cold indifference he had felt since a child. He foolishly took this as a sign that he just wasn't trying hard enough, so he was even more cheerful, to the point that it hurt. He became fake, becoming someone he wasn't just to fit in. And the worst part was that it didn't help a bit. Sasuke still betrayed them.

It was still with that same foolish smile that he promised to Sakura that he would bring Sasuke back, and it was with that same foolish determination that he would pursue a cause for someone else, and not for himself. Sure, he valued Sasuke as a friend and slightly respected him, because he was the first one to acknowledge him, but Sasuke was, quite frankly, a head dick. But it was what Sakura wanted, so he chased after him.

He saw his teammates fight and fall against those they encountered: Shikamaru, Chouji, Neiji, even brash Kiba had met their matches. He knew that, for them, he would bring Sasuke back. Even with that noble promise, in the back of his mind Naruto knew that what he was doing was detrimental against himself. Despite the good intentions, he was still doing it for others and giving himself away for them.

So he met Sasuke at the Valley of the End. He fought Sasuke for everyone else; everyone he held precious to him: for the sacrifice that his teammates had made, for the memory of the Sandaime and his will to protect all citizens of Konoha, for all those narrow minded villagers, who he still cherished because they were part of the place he loved, for Sakura, who had fallen for Sasuke, and for whom Naruto would gladly sacrifice his true self for. But when it came down to the actual fight, he found all those ideals melting away. He thought not about the good he was doing for all the others around him, not about his selfless acts and self-sacrificing ways. He only felt the present: the here and now. And somehow, amidst that frantic fighting for his life, he realized that he had given so much of himself away for others that he barely had anything left for himself.

So, in the middle of the chaos of the fighting, he had given up his idealistic attempts to better those around him at his own expense. He thought only of himself: Protecting himself and defeating his opponent for him, and not for anyone else. He realized just how tired he was of giving away chunks of himself, and so he gave up. He gave up trying to prove himself to people he knew would never acknowledge him. And he understood that you know what? He didn't need their recognition. So he fought for himself.

The black Chidori and the red Rasengan met together before the crashing rapids of the waterfall, a mighty blast of power succeeded by a white-black orb of power that absorbed everything around them. And after, all that was left was Naruto lying face up with Sasuke above him.

Naruto wasn't unconscious. Far from it, his thoughts were racing. Just when he had finally found himself, Sasuke would kill him. (And he was certain that he would) He did not want to die. He did NOT want to die. He didn't want to die! HE DIDN'T WANT TO DIE!! So he would NOT!

The massive red form behind the bars of the cage stirred as two bloodred eyes opened, finally waking. The Kyuubi could feel that it's host's fear, running like a frigid river through him. Naruto truly believed that he would die, and the fox picked up on that, believing that to be true as well. The frigid river of fear flowed into the fox, and it quickly roared as its red chakra seeped out, mingling into the chakra veins of Naruto.

Pain flooded through Naruto and his eyes shot open, his pupils dilated by his fear and by the power surging through him. The Fox's chakra jolted him into action, like a shot of caffeine. His hands, immediately becoming clawed, clutched Sasuke's head and tugged him backwards, throwing him into the rock wall behind them. Naruto rose as Sasuke slumped to face him.

"Impossible. . . that red energy should have drained him. . . he was as exhausted as I was! He couldn't even move!" Indeed, it would appear that the blonde had gotten his second wind as he stalked forward towards Sasuke. Naruto sank to his hands and feet, crouching and crawling like an animal, racing towards him. Naruto leaped at the last second, feet barreling into Sasuke's chest like a freight train, crashing him into the canyon's wall even further. Naruto raised a curled fist and drove it right into Sasuke's stomach, knocking the wind out of him. Another fist to the temple left Sasuke leaning at an angle with blood dribbling out of his mouth. Sasuke was clearly unconscious, but Naruto would not stop there. He kept driving his fists into Sasuke, reducing him into a bloody pulp. Then, suddenly, his fist met Sasuke's solar plexus, and the thing bone broke and drove a shard into Sasuke's heart. Naruto could tell the change immediately: something in Sasuke's face gave out and he sank down into a position that the human body shouldn't be comfortable doing.

Icy hot reason rose back into Naruto, his bloodlust draining from him. The last resolves of the Kyuubi's chakra left him, and he sank to his knees. With the power that kept him awake gone, he was reduced to the stage earlier, when he was too weak to stand. He saw what he had done and he felt. . . odd. He knew he should feel something, some kind of regret for causing the death and the resulting tragedy that the others would surely feel, but instead he felt nothing. His face was left blank, and it was that way that Kakashi found him.


	2. Chapter 2

Found Within

I know I just posted chap. 1 a little bit ago, but my muse is a fickle bitch with a very short attention span, so I need to do this while I can. This one is much longer. And harder. And full of 100 more sea men.

* * *

Tsunade stood above an unconscious Naruto, who was lying on a hospital bed. Kakashi stood by her side impatiently.

"So you're saying that the final surge of the Kyuubi's chakra hurt him somehow?" asked the cyclopean jounin.

"Not just hurt him, it nearly crippled him. He was in no condition to use that kind of power again, and the chakra burned through his chakra veins. It caused numerous ruptures all throughout the veins, leading to increased leakage of chakra. In short, Naruto now constantly bleeds out chakra. It's like a water bottle with holes poked into it: normally, you can focus the water out of the top, but with all the holes, the water leaks out when you don't want it to."

"Then his life as a shinobi is pretty much over?"

"Correct. Any other shinobi would die from something like this, but Naruto has so much chakra, that it won't kill him. It will, however, make any jutsu he uses highly unstable. I would be surprised if he would be able to even perform a Henge in the state that he is in."

"And. . . what of Sasuke?"

"I'm afraid that he's deceased. The sliver of bone pushed through his heart, puncturing the left ventricle and severing the superior vena cava. He likely died instantly."

Kakashi's thoughts raced. Fuck, now one of his students was dead and the other in critical condition, likely never being able to be a ninja again. If only he had noticed sooner. If only he had helped Naruto overcome the temptation of the Kyuubi's power. If only he could have gotten through to Sasuke before he went traitor. If only. . . .

Fuck.

The hardest part would be to tell Naruto once he awakened, and to tell Sakura as well. This was not going to be a fun day.

* * *

Cerulean eyes opened to the unpleasant sight of the cracked hospital ceiling. Naruto rose, the metal frame of the cheap bed supporting his bruised back.

'Wait,' he thought. 'My bruised back? The damn fox didn't heal me?' The events of the previous day surfaced to his mind, but he still did not feel any regret or remorse. He did what he needed to do to protect himself. His orders were to bring back Sasuke, or to prevent him from going traitor. And that's just what he did. So his actions were justified . . . right?

He was snapped out of his thought with the entrance of Tsunade, who sat down on the foot of the bed.

"Naruto . . . we knew what happened. Sasuke's dead, and you've done some serious damage to yourself. Your body was in no condition to harness the Kyuubi's demonic chakra again. It caused irrevocable damage to your chakra veins." Tsunade explained the specifics to him; a steadily angrier face rising on Naruto.

"So you're telling me . . . that I can no longer be ninja?"

" . . . I'm so sorry, Naruto." Naruto grimaced, before another thought rose to his head.

"Why hasn't the damn fox healed me yet?"

"He can't, dumbass! Your chakra veins were nearly totaled! Any more demonic chakra would kill you! The only reason you're still alive is that you have a freakish amount of chakra to waste, leaving you enough to still live. In a desperate situation, you might be able to use it for a short amount of time to boost your healing, but that's only in an emergency."

Naruto seethed as he sank back into his pillows, succumbing into sleep.

Hours later, he was finally discharged from the hospital. Any other would likely spend more time there for rest and recuperation, but the prejudice of the villagers extended to the staff of the hospital. When he had woken up, he had found a note from Kakashi telling him to meet at their usual bridge spot, so he trudged along the familiar route.

When he arrived, he saw the sight of Kakashi leaning over the side of the bridge, a melancholy look in his eye. Sakura was off to the side, head bowed over her sitting form. The sound of his footsteps on the bridge caused both to rise, and it was then that Naruto saw how bloodshot and puffy Sakura's eyes were from crying.

"Sakura I . . . I'm sorry. I failed you." Naruto stood firm, gazing Sakura in the eyes. Sakura's lip quivered, before she replied.

"I. . . it's fine. You had to . . . protect yourself. There was nothing you could do . . . It would only be the other way around had you not acted. I just wish you had. . . you had. . ." Sakura succumbed to tears again, sinking to her knees.

" . . . what? Wish I had what? Tried harder? Is that it? I fucking fought him, I got a Chidori through the chest from him, I HAD to kill him! Otherwise, he would have killed me and then run like a coward! I fulfilled my mission! If you're so eager to judge my actions, then why didn't YOU go out there and fucking fight him?! You-"

"Naruto! That's enough. You're over reacting." Kakashi's stern voice cut through Naruto's words, forcing him into silence.

". . . Fine. You know what? Whatever. I don't have to justify my actions." Naruto swiveled on his heel, walking back the way he came.

"Naruto! Where are you going?" Kakashi demanded.

"To train. Our team is obviously in shambles, so until you pull Sakura together, don't talk to me." With that, Naruto carried on walking, with a slight limp, leaving a sobbing Sakura with Kakashi shaking his head in defeat.

* * *

"KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!!" Naruto roared for the umpteenth time, his fingers crossed in the familiar hand seal. He could feel the chakra flowing through him, through his veins, before leaking out. No, leaking wasn't the best word. . . it was more like 'flooding.' The chakra he channeled would just flood out of him, visibly dissipating in the air, with no bunshins as a result; only wasted chakra. To Naruto, it felt like thousands of knives were forcing their way out of him, and he growled with pain before he finally cut the flow of chakra.

"Damnit! Fucking Uchiha, always has to ruin everything for me!" Tsunade was right: He couldn't channel chakra worth shit. Even academy student techniques, like a Henge or flowing chakra into his hands to augment his hits, was impossible for him. He sighed in anguish before he heard the distinct cry of a hawk above him. Naruto instinctively knew the message was for him, so he knew he was to report to the Hokage immediately. And that he did.

* * *

"Oh, come on! Give me one mission! Just one!"

"No, Naruto. Your team is in shambles and you yourself are in no condition to perform any missions. You are given a week's absence until we are to decide the fate of Team Seven, and your individual fate." Tsunade's stern voice echoed in the small room, Naruto standing flabbergasted before her with Sakura and Kakashi in the back.

"Please, just give me one chance to believe in me! Just give me one try! Trust me. . . I can do this." Tsunade saw something glittering in Naruto's eyes: dwindling hope and his dreams being shattered, as well as steely determination beneath it. She sighed, before shuffling amongst her papers and withdrawing one individual file.

"Fine. You know, you never know when to give up." Naruto grinned at those words.

"Here's a simple C-rank mission: scare away some bandits that have been plaguing the road west to Suna. This is your one chance. Fail this, and you will be removed from the ninja roster. Good luck." Naruto snatched up the paper before darting out of the office. Tsunade nodded at Kakashi, who understood that he was to follow the blonde.

* * *

As he walked, Naruto thought about his plan. First off, he didn't even know where the bandit camp was. Secondly, even if he found them, he didn't know how he could take them. All his thoughts and doubts clouded his head. What if Tsunade was really right? What if he was unfit to be shinobi any longer? Even Lee could flow a minute amount of chakra: enough to enhance his body in his fighting style. Who had ever heard about a ninja who's own chakra could hurt him?

Amongst the chaos in his mind, one thought of clarity abolished the doubts and fears: It doesn't really matter. There was a low chance that he would succeed, surely, but it did little to worry on it now. He remembered the freedom of his fight with Sasuke when he had abandoned what was expected of him and when he started to just live in the moment. He brought that feeling back to the surface, and he walked with an increasing confidence.

Kakashi watched from the branches beside him. Normally, even Naruto could detect his chakra, but Naruto was emitting so much chakra of his own, that it was impossible for him to detect much of anything anymore. That was another thing: what Tsunade had said was absolutely true: he literally bled out chakra. It was like a humongous blip on a radar; impossible to miss. He might as well of been banging drums and blaring horns to announce his presence: any ninja worth the title could sense him. Hell, even a civilian would detect him through their instincts in the form of a nagging feeling of being watched. Kakashi had serious doubts that Naruto would even survive, but that was why he was there.

After what seemed to be like an eternity, there was finally action upon the road. Out of nowhere, three masked men leaped out of the forest and shanghaied Naruto, dashing back into the woods. Kakashi had detected them a while back, but it would seem that Naruto indeed could not detect any chakra presences, however obvious.

Naruto's eyes shot open with the introduction of a bucket of ice cold water dumped onto his head. He surveyed the scene to see that he was tied to a post in the middle of a cluster of tents with a number of burly, thuggish looking men standing around him.

'Well, it looks like I found their camp.'

"Okay, brat. We've seen your Hitai'ait. We know you're from Konoha. We know that you're a ninja, though a crappy one from the look of how much chakra you're expending. We're not excepting you to talk. We're just gonna kill you."

"Heh, pretty straightforward, wasn't that? Just like my dick in YO MAMMA!!" Naruto roared, seeming not to really care about the seriousness of his situation. In the back of his mind, he wondered at it. He honestly didn't give a crap about whether he lived or died. There was almost no chance that he would succeed in the mission, so he would fail his dream anyways. So why not just have some fun before he died?

A chorus of 'ooooah!'s' erupted around the camp from the ragtag group of rogues, their leader frowning at their captive.

"Feisty, aren't you?"

"That's what _she_ said!"

"Damnit, I'm done with your games!"

"So was your mom, but she kept calling me back!!"

The bandit leader charged forward, thrusting at him with his kunai. Although Naruto could no longer use chakra, he didn't need it to dodge the kunai, which conveniently cut through the rope binding him to the post. What resulted as a full on chase around the pole with the bandit slashing at Naruto, while he simply evaded it.

Naruto knew that the results were pretty much decided. The bandits were just playing around right now, having their fun before they killed him. But why not have some fun of his own?

"Damnit, stay still!"

"Why? You're sister didn't!"

"You'll pay for that!"

"Go ahead, punish me. I've been ever so bad!"

Soon enough, the bandit leader skidded to a halt and glared at Naruto, before declaring, "Playtime's over. Kill the brat."

Naruto's playful mood died as the near countless bandits grabbed an assortment of weapons and charged directly his way. He fell into a typical taijutsu stance, prepared to fight until his death.

He followed the taijutsu form to the letter, admirably so. But the rigid form of the fighting style limited him, so that soon he had a kunai sticking out of his arm and several shuriken in his chest. He coughed out blood as his thought raced.

'Okay, that guy is preparing an overhead downwards slash so should a parry, dodge, or . . . damnit! This is not working!' Naruto attempted to dodge said strike, but the bandit predicted his movements and brought a horizontal strike with an offhand hatchet. Naruto ducked to the ground, barely avoiding it, but the return strike hit him in the temple. It was the blunt side, so it didn't kill him, but it brought him to his knees in a daze.

The bandit leader stepped forward, scimitar slung lazily over his shoulders.

"Time to die, punk." The leader raised his sword in a classic 'executioner' pose.

Kakashi nearly dove out of his spot in the treetops to attempt to save the blonde, but he saw a flicker of action in his eyes and somehow, he knew Naruto would be okay.

Naruto really was tired of not living his life for himself: following the strict katas of the academy taijutsu style, memorizing pre-chosen passages from books, performing jutsus that the teachers wanted him to do. Ninja students, and even most genin, were molded into the same cookie-cutter fighters. They were never given a chance to follow their own paths, until later in their genin carriers. Needless to say, Naruto had gotten sick of the method that they had followed, so after all the techniques that he had been taught and used didn't work, he decided to just. . . go wild.

As the sword swept down to his neck, Naruto pushed back with his hands, sliding under the legs of the bandit behind him. He quickly shoved said bandit forward and directly into the path of the leader's sword, which stuck into his skull with a dull 'thunk.' Naruto rose and turned to face the horizontal sweep of a very familiar hatchet, from the man who had knocked him to his knees. Naruto raised his forearm and the hatchet bit into his arm, catching on the bone. Naruto restrained a hiss of pain and yanked his arm away, before dislodging the hatchet and throwing it between the eyes of it's former user. He dove to the ground, avoiding the strike of a large claymore, before prying out the sword from the right hand of the man he just killed.

He rolled backward, towards the man with the claymore, as the man brought down a helm-breaker slash. Naruto rolled far enough back that when the claymore's tip thunked into the ground, he was inside the reach of the man. Naruto reached back and thrust his sword into the man's stomach, before kicking out his feet, forcing the man to fall upon the sword and slump to the ground. Behind him, a bandit with a katana slashed down at Naruto, and Naruto raised the dead man's corpse to protect him. The katana, easily capable of slashing through flesh and bone, hacked off the arm of the corpse: the arm holding the claymore.

Naruto raised the arm by where the shoulder would connect to it, and swung the arm, and the sword held by it, at his attacker. Normally, the bandit would easily parry it had he been holding just the sword, but, when the bandit automatically went to parry the arm itself, the sword reached around his guard and stabbed him in the neck. Naruto grabbed the dying man's body and thrust it into the way of an incoming sword, which went clean through the dying man's stomach. Naruto heard yet another bandit come up behind him, brandishing an axe, so he tugged on the arm of the sword-bandit, forcing the sword to go even further through the katana-bandit's body. Naruto moved aside, letting the momentum of the pull stab the axe-bandit with the protruding tip of the sword.

Naruto then grabbed the axe from the bandit's hands and cracked it into the skull of the sword-bandit. An eerie calm in the eye of the storm descended upon them, and Naruto gazed back to see all the bandits gaping at the blonde. Hell, even he was surprised at what he had done. No technique. No form. Just instinct and act without thought. Never the less, the fight had to continue.

A kunai whistled through the air and bit into Naruto's left thigh. Naruto bared his teach and ripped it out just to see another bandit, armed with a staff, come charging towards him. The bandit attempted to use one end, then the other, to hit Naruto, but he managed to dodge it. The bandit followed up with a pump to the chest using the middle of the staff; in between where he held it. Naruto leapt back, before clutching the middle of the staff with both hands and swinging himself between the legs of the stunned bandit, with his kunai in his teeth. He grabbed the kunai from between his teeth and slashed at the hamstrings of the bandit, making him fall to the ground, before Naruto pushed the kunai into the soft spot at the back of the head where the spine connects it.

Naruto spun as a bandit armed with a shield and short sword charged at him. Naruto took a pre-emptive strike and jump-kicked at the enemy. The bandit placed his shield in the way, and Naruto ended up kicking it. Naruto rebounded off the shield, ending up sprawled in the dirt. The bandit rushed him again, and Naruto clutched up the staff and thrust it at him. The bandit whacked the staff away with his shield like it was a twig. The bandit cockily slowed to a walk as he approached a helpless Naruto. He raised his sword to finish him off. . .

Before a handful of dirt was thrown into his eyes. He dropped the sword and clawed at his eyes, trying to somehow heal them, as Naruto rose and grabbed his sword.

"You little cocksucker! That was a dirty trick!" roared the bandit, even as he still groped at his eyes.

"All's fair in love and war" The sword met the bandit's neck.

Naruto quickly scavenged the shield off the corpse and strapped it to his left arm, still brandishing the sword. He was once again on alert when an arrow dug into the dirt right by his left foot. Sure enough, there were about three archers, all with an arrow knocked, pointing directly at him. The first hit him in the right arm, making him drop the sword. The second hit in the thigh, painfully close to his first kunai wound. He managed to deflect the last with his shield, right before he fell the ground. He feebly crawled backwards as the archer knocked back another volley. The three arrows sped through the air, before biting into flesh. Naruto had just managed to crawl into the pile of corpses before the arrows hit. Confident that he was dead, two of the archers stepped forward with kunai drawn in their hands, bow slung by the quiver. And they stood over the mound of corpses, searching for Naruto's corpse.

Naruto jumped from the pile of bodies with the two arrows that hit him in his hands. It appeared that he managed to pull a corpse in the way of the three arrows that would have been fatale otherwise. He stabbed the archer on the right through the eye with his right hand arrow before knocking down the archer on the left with a brutal side kick. The third archer, still standing a ways back, let fly an arrow, which thumped into Naruto's shield. Naruto slung off the bow from the dying archer on the right and inexpertly knocked his left-hand arrow. He shot in the general direction of the third archer, and was lucky enough to hit his chest. It wasn't a fatal hit, but it was enough to prolong the archer's next shot. With what little time he had, Naruto ran forward and ripped the bow out of the archer's hands. He drug him to a nearby tree and smashed his head against it with his shield. The shield became so dented that it was unusable, so Naruto discarded it to the side. As he rose, gore splattered over his orange jumpsuit, he remembered the archer he had simply knocked down.

Naruto turned around to see that the second archer had knocked back an arrow and had it pointing directly at him. Naruto no longer had his shield, and he had already sustained a kunai wound, a hatched to the arm, a blow to the head, and two arrows, so he doubted he would survive this last shot. He didn't have time to unbuckle his pouch and throw a kunai or shuriken (which he had just remembered he had) and he doubted he could dodge a speeding arrow. So he had time for a last ditch move: He formed his fingers into a cross and screamed "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" even as the arrow sped forward. Naruto pumped chakra through himself, which drained from him painfully, resulting in another unsuccessful jutsu. However, it did have some unexpected side effects: The massive amount of chakra he pumped out of himself pushed outward in all directions. Even though the chakra had no form, there was so much of it that it pushed the speeding arrow to the side, effectively knocking it down mid-flight. Naruto, of course, didn't notice it: He only noticed that he was not stabbed by an arrow. Kakashi, however, with Sharingan uncovered, had noticed, and he was intrigued indeed.

Naruto quickly reached down and threw three shuriken at the last archer, thunking into his chest and head, killing him. Naruto breathed heavily as he turned to see that only the leader was left standing. Said leader, seeing his men brutally killed, naturally turned tail and ran away. Naruto, with a grin on his face, gave chase. Naruto threw forward a shuriken, which dug into the leader's leg, causing him to fall face-first into the dirt, his sword falling at his side. The leader's hand reached out to grab the fallen sword, but another shuriken buried itself into the back of his hand, and he withdrew it into his chest. Naruto scooped up the sword, giving the man a boot to the face, before dragging him closer to one of the nearby trees. He raised him up so that his back was against the tree, before slapping him across the face with the flat side of the scimitar repeatedly. Finally, he impaled the sword through the man's chest, nailing him to the tree. Naruto walked back without another look, blind to the dying man's pleas for mercy. Looks like he would still be a ninja after all.


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry that this chapter was a little late. I hate a large dose of writer's block halfway through. Well, I think I'm coming to like this little story of mine. I'll definitely continue it. It's a promise. The last chapter was rather long, more than double that of the first one. Although I can not promise that length every chapter, I will promise that there will be at least 1 fight every other chapter.

* * *

Tsunade's eyes wandered from the mission report in front of her, to the blonde grinning before her desk, and back to the report again.

"You. . . were actually successful?"

"Uh-huh!"

"You decimated a group of bandits using nothing but their own weapons?"

"Uh-huh! I also used a couple shuriken but. . ."

"Well now, according to this mission report written by Kakashi-"

"I can't believe you stalked me the whole way, Sensei!"

"Humph"

"It seems that you handled yourself well under difficult circumstances. A mission like that would be cakewalk for a ninja of your caliber, but to do it without chakra is rather astounding."

Naruto beamed at this.

". . . Though, I'm not completely convinced. You have earned the chance to prove yourself again, however. Report again in a couple days and I will have another solo mission for you. If you succeed with that . . . we'll see what we can do about keeping you on the roster. Dismissed."

Naruto smirked confidently before swiveling on his heel and walking out of the room. With a wave of her hand, Tsunade silently told Kakashi to step forward.

"Kakashi. . . you mentioned that he used some kind of chakra technique you've never seen before to deflect an arrow? Explain. Naruto shouldn't be able to mold chakra for any kind of jutsu."

"It wasn't a jutsu, per say. It wasn't even molded. Naruto expelled pure, raw chakra to deflect it, and he looked like he did it on accident while attempting a Kage Bunshin."

"Well, this is an unexpected change. It would be possible, with the amount of pure chakra that Naruto has. I see why they call him Konoha's No. 1 Surprising Ninja." Kakashi laughed, before his dismissal via a wave of Tsunade's hand, while her other hand already reached into her drawer, clasping a bottle of sake. Tsunade smiled to herself, thinking that despite his hardship, Naruto could still become a powerful shinobi

. . . Maybe even to the level of his father.

* * *

Naruto quickly bounded from rooftop to rooftop, blazing high above the pedestrian's heads. He recalled the fight, and marveled at its difficulty without chakra. Now, he understood what Lee felt. Since his academy days, when he first learned how to use chakra, he had depended on it in his daily life, as well as in his ninja duties. To live, to fight without the feel of chakra flowing through him was . . . strange, to say the least. He felt naked, almost. As if a part of him were missing.

At first, he had felt helpless, powerless, as if he was a normal civilian again, who couldn't tell the difference between a kunai and a senbon. But when he had let go of his anxiety during that fight, something clicked inside him. It wasn't any sort of bloodline or special technique, nor was it the fox's influence; his instincts had just guided him through. No, not guided . . . he moved side by side with his instincts, without thought, without worry. He didn't decide what he would do at any one time. . . he just did it, without hesitation, without thought of repercussions. And he had felt remarkably free, as if he was his own man instead of a weapon of Konoha.

It was then he realized that as much as they preached of having the most humane of Ninja, Konoha still bred their shinobi into weapons for their village. It was not with the killing of emotions and the growth of ice around their hearts that Konoha's ninja became weapons, (Although with ninja like Itachi, this was very much the case) but it was the subtle whisper in the ear of the protection of their innocents and of the pride of their village that Konoha changed children into true shinobi. The process ended up with ninja like Kakashi, who would give their lives for the mission, for their village.

With a startling gasp of realization, Naruto decided not to live that way, not to become an idealistic tool, however humane, of his village, and he decided to live his life as a free man. It wasn't that he hated Konoha; far from it. The village was his love and, despite the often times shallow villagers, he would fight to protect it. But he would not lose himself. That he pledged.

All this deep thought was brushed away in an instant, however, by the sweet, sweet smell of ramen. Even if his ideals and morals changed, Naruto would always love the taste of that exquisite food.

* * *

After his meal, Naruto continued home, although he simply walked instead of leaped. Night was descending, and the sky was turning a pleasant blue-black as the stars peaked out of the clouds. He finally reached the complex where he lived, and he trudged up the stairs to apartment number 2472. He chucked his keys on the counter, walking the short distance to his 'bedroom.' He dropped onto the bed face up, staring at the ceiling.

He hadn't dealt with it yet, but Sasuke's death (Murder. You MURDERED him!!) would have some serious repercussions, some of which he already saw with Sakura. He had felt largely numb to the entire issue (Issue? Death isn't just some 'issue!') but now he felt rather guilty, at least. It was hard to explain the emotion. It was like the satisfaction of taking candy from a baby and not getting caught, but then being forced to watch as the baby bawl to itself. Except instead of candy, it was Sasuke's life and. . .

He didn't know how to classify it. Sasuke, despite all his shortcomings, was one of Naruto's best friends. What he had thought before about not being affected by it was an outright lie. Sasuke was the first to see him as a rival, an equal, instead of the class clown, or some twerp, or the reminder of a great demon. And he had. . .

FUCK

Naruto rose slowly, seeing his clock and noticing that an hour had passed. He changed into some flannel pants and a plain black shirt and opened the window, climbing onto the roof. It had been pathetically easy in the past, with him being able to walk on walls and whatnot, but now, it made him recall his struggling as a child in the past. Never the less, he made it safely, and he sat at the edge of the roof. It was breathtaking, seeing the forest of buildings and billboards stretch in every direction. In the daytime, the village seemed peaceful to most, but slightly hostile to him. But at night . . . it seemed subdued and cool.

Many children were afraid of the dark, but as a child, Naruto could only find respite in its dark cloak. He had already seen things much scarier than monsters, like grown men who could love a wife and child one day and beat another child the next. Naruto could always find reprieve when everyone else was asleep. It was . . . nice, to see the moon shining brightly against the feeble-looking light of the stars and the corporal world bellow. He wanted to be like the moon- radiant, standing out amongst the hundreds of thousands of stars.

He had always felt the expectations of others and the weight of his duties melt away when he sat alone there, and he felt how good it was to be his own person now instead of an instrument of others. He never wanted to give up his freedom.

He found his thought wandering as his eyes drooped closed. Slowly, almost reluctantly, he climbed back down through the window, flopping face down on his bed. Sleep claimed him almost instantly.

* * *

The morning's rays shined on Naruto's back, and he waked gradually. He shuffled in, and out, of the shower, heated some instant ramen, and slipped on his orange pants and a fresh black shirt, forgoing the usual orange jacket due to the warm weather outside. He stepped outside his door, locking it, and he made his way to the park.

Naruto flopped down onto a bench, noticing the surrounding children scatter at the behest of their parents. When he was younger, he was always jealous of other children for having a family who loved him. And, to a certain extent, he was still jealous today, but he had largely moved past that, and he had understood that in a way, this was better. He had a freedom unseen by his friends: if he wanted to go out, he just did. He ate what he pleased and slept how he wanted, and generally acted how he was comfortable.

Eventually, Naruto grew bored of his musings (and the harsh glares the nearby parents were giving him) so he picked himself up and wandered aimlessly about town. He found himself at his team's training ground, empty now. And it would probably remain that way, without the daily antics of their close-knit team. . . Naruto walked up to one of the battered, wooden target dummies. Although he had proven, both to himself and to Tsunade, that he was an adequate fighter without chakra, it still pissed him off to lose something so vital to himself. He had tried it before, but still . . .

"Fuuton: Wind Blade jutsu!" Naruto molded the chakra in the familiar way for the basic wind jutsu, but instead of blades of wind cutting apart the dummy, all he got was raw chakra pushed away from him. However, he noticed that the chakra had knocked several leaves off of the surrounding trees. He remembered the previous day, when he had deflected an arrow with pure chakra, and he got an idea.

He went through the seals again, molding the chakra in the same technique as before, but this time he pushed an even higher amount if chakra outward. Sure enough, more leaves were knocked off and the grass at his feet was sliced. He repeated the process, but with more chakra, and then more.

Naruto finally stopped, breathing heavily. After pushing a large amount of chakra in the form of the technique, he had managed to slice off many of the surrounding branches, and had scored several deep gashes through the dummy. He smirked, and then tried again, but this time, he didn't even try to mold it: He just pushed, without handseals, without direction. The chakra pushed outwards, ripping through the warm air. He was rewarded with even better results than before. Unchecked, the destructive power of his chakra had severed the wooden dummy into two parts and nearly chopped down the tree closest to him. All of that without almost any effort on his part, and with little expense of chakra. Just to imagine how much better it could be with a little more chakra, a little less control. . .

Even if he couldn't mold chakra, he wasn't entirely without it. Naruto decided to keep it his little secret. However, unknown to him, Tsunade, who was hiding nearby, had seen the whole thing.

* * *

Not much action this chapter, but right now, i'm fleshing things out some more. And by the way, does anyone know of a good online English to Japanese katakana (text) translation engine, it would be great if you could supply a link.


End file.
